Dodging Bullets – The Weird Side of the Internet

Dodging Bullets – The Weird Side of the Internet – by Liam Sweeny.

Two kids, friends. Smoking weed, talking smack. Gun afficionados or maybe just badasses. One friend tells the other he can dodge bullets. Again, smoking weed. Two guns and they go into the garage. One unloads, the other zen’s himself for the dodge. It’s not real, just an aim and a dodge and a very rough determination of whether or not the ephemeral bullet was dodged. One wasn’t dodged, and sadly, this one was a real bullet that never got unloaded.

A shot in the chest, buddy tries rescusitation but it’s a no-go. Paramedics come, they go, but there’s no luck, no restoring the mortal coil. The law hits the shooting friens with manslaughter and weapons charges.

This situation could be upended and twisted corkscrew and spring a bouquet of megaphones, but at it’s heart it’s a story of idiocy. Guy thought he could dodge bullets. Having been a connoisseur of high grade pot for a time in my life, I can say that I have believed I could do things. I could play like Hendrix, paint like Renoir, write like Cervantes and cook like an incarcerated chef with a huge commissary. But I never thought I could dodge a bullet, not even down a block, much less in a eight foot garage. This is a sad story, but I think if there were no guns involved, they would’ve done some other dumbass thing that would’ve gone wrong.

My pick is one of them would’ve said they were immune to electricity and the other would’ve brought a toaster into the bathroom to prove it. It’s not that people shouldn’t have fun and sometimes live dangerously, but do it in such a way that if you go down, it doesn’t end up in the fifth column down on your local weird news page.

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