The Heights – An Xperience Column

The Heights – An Xperience Column – by Liam Sweeny.

Over the past two years, I’ve stepped away from many commitments. Most exist in the arena of live musical performance, but also within my personal life. Like many, I felt overwhelmed, confused, uninspired, exhausted, and without purpose. I’ve heard from others who are experiencing a similar circumstance. In this month’s edition of The Heights I will concentrate on presenting the philosophies that guided me through my storm and helped me to find myself among the chaos.

The first concept that one must come to terms with is that no transformation into greatness arises without traveling through the darkness. We must also know that not all darkness is negative. As one man put it, “Just like a seed buried beneath the soil, we will inevitably break open and enter the light as a growing tree.” That seed needed to remain in darkness until it was prepared to be revealed in all of its greatness. People are no different than nature. We need time, water, sun, a caring hand, and at first the dark if we are to become who we are truly meant to be. Embrace your situation, know it isn’t forever, and always be preparing yourself for what you believe you are deserving of.

The second hurdle we must overcome is repeating the phrase “Why is this happening to me?” What I have learned to say is “Thank you, Lord, for this opportunity to see what it is I have yet to resolve in my life.” Like many, I thought my pain and lack of progress were bestowed upon me because some force deemed me unworthy of greatness. I believed my future was doomed to be riddled with a collection of failures and shattered aspirations of what I could have been. I realize now that my life was a consequence of my poor decisions. That what I believed I could become was not being backed by the preparation necessary to arrive at my desired destination. There was no outside force holding me back. It was I who was allowing the chatter from others, low self-esteem, a violent childhood, and bad habits to rule over my suspended potential. I let the external dictate my outcomes. I now know that the external can never award our souls the ultimate reward of peace. Peace does not manifest itself from money, the approval of others, or external successes. Peace is rewarded to those with the willingness to look inward, let go, and let God into our hearts. Maybe not for everybody, but it has sure worked for me.

The third barrier standing in many people’s way is the resonating emotional pain that has built up over many years of loss, heartache, and rejection. Pain that seems like it will never divorce itself from our hearts and minds. But nothing could be further from the truth. What is pain? It is pretending that everything is fine when it is not. It is holding onto the rejection of a loved one or former partner. Pain is a mirror that reminds us of what we no longer have or what we never became. Yes, maybe these statements are true, but pain is also something much more profound. Pain is the very thing that attempts to destroy you, only to rebuild you back as the person you were always meant to be. Pain doesn’t shatter us because we are weak. It does this so we may finally meet the truest version of ourselves. Is it an easy path to look inward, acknowledge our hurt, and begin the journey to become a fully realized person? No … and that’s exactly how it must be for some. One must endure if wishing to become pure. The beauty is that a beautiful life awaits everyone willing to prepare themselves for its arrival.

Every great story has a comeback. Each molded in its own unique image. Each at the exact time as it was created to unveil itself. The road to becoming who you know you are meant to be isn’t like the movies. It doesn’t happen in 90 minutes or because you wish it to be. It happens when you have prepared your mind, body, and spirit to receive it. It happens when you let go of the pain, accept that not everybody is going to like you, and stop searching outward for validation from those undeserving of your spiritual wealth. When you finally awaken to the reality that happiness isn’t the goal, wholeness is, then you can truly start to love yourself, respect yourself, and accept yourself.

I’ll end with this …

Our outer world is a mirror into our inner world. It’s a reflection of those things which we have yet to resolve. Most of what we experience or are denied comes as a result of the choices we make. Poor choices garner poor results. I spent nearly all of my life incarcerated in an emotional prison that I allowed others to build for me. I accepted that I wasn’t good enough to be successful. That I wasn’t kind enough to be loved. Not because I believed this in my heart, but because of my experiences as a child, as a young student being judged by those who were entrusted to educate me, and as a denier of a higher power. When I look back now, I do not recognize that person. I’ve been fortunate to have great people enter my life as a man. Some of which are gone now, but many are still here guiding me through the darkness. People like Lee Shaw, Hal Galper, and Nat Phipps have passed onto heaven. They left impressions on many who, to this day, still share their lessons. Those who remain, such as Chris Garabedian, Ralph Lalama, Stacy Dillard, Keith Pray, Kevin Champagne, and others, continue to inspire me today.

If you’re struggling, I encourage you to stop, reflect, and make the difficult decisions. Understand that life is worth more than simply existing inside of it. You are deserving of greatness, success, and peace. Understand that our universe does not award perfection; it awards alignment. And, the greatest gift you will ever receive is to truly know yourself.

God Bless You.

Warmest Regards,

Joe

 

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