Bocox – The Weird Side of the Internet

Bocox – The Weird Side of the Internet – by Liam Sweeny.

Bocox. You know sometimes I like to bury the lede, an old newspaper term for hiding the main point, dressing it up in about a paragraph of witty repartee. But not this one. Bocox. That name, which is for a treatment, is listed in Grey’s Anatomy, or any suitably bizarre Chilton’s Manual, is exactly what it sounds like. Botox for your bozack. It is being don’t in the United Kingdom. Hell, it’s going on here, but I didn’t read about it in American Cosmetic Failures Quarterly. I found it on UK’s Unilad, which I get a few of these from, and I encourage you to check the site out.

So penile adventures are not going well in the U’K. People are injecting Botulinum toxin into their love guns. And wouldn’t you know it, that in some ‘pop-up clinics,’ people are getting mangled. One man, after having injected himself with a “Vaseline-type substance,” he is now… less one. Yeah, I can’t imagine having to lose my sidekick, especially due to my own insecurity. Because what person secure in his manhood thinks to do this in the first place?

So apparently, these clinics are nothing new. If Cyrano had money, and wasn’t a lowly poet with a massive honker, he indeed would’ve gotten Roxane, and she being his cousin, he also would’ve gotten whispers and stares at the family picnic.

So please understand, fellas, that the average penis length is not twelve inches, it’s not as thick as a bat, and if you’re looking at that as your normal, you’re way off. In fact, you will have an easier time finding someone if you have a reasonable image of yourself. Maybe Botox your personality instead. Because she’s going to know you dipped your wick if she gets a good look, but she’ll have no idea where you learned to make a goof Alfredo sauce.

 

 

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