One Chip Challenge – Killer?

Harris Wolobah died. Maybe I should say that first. No jokes, no cornspun stories, though those may come later. Teenager, tenth-grader. Basketball player. And while they don’t totally know the exact cause of death, it occurred directlt after Wolobah ate a chip.

Not just any chip. This was a chip packaged all by its lonesome, previously available everywhere including 7-Eleven and Walgreens, called the “One Chip Challenge.”

What is the One Chip Challenge? You know. C’mon, we all know. Eat a chip forged it the fiery bowels of hell and get on Facebook or TikTok, testing your mettle, seeing how long you can go without asking for water. Really an exercise in performative pain.

A few years ago, I grew Carolina Reapers in my yard. At the time, they were the hottest peppers on planet earth, north of 2 million Scoville heat units. How did they taste? No clue, never ate one. Lord, what do you think I am? I gave them away to far braver friends than I. Some of them called me a week later with language I can’t use here. And these people knew they were that hot.

One of my friends did do a video. If I can find it, I’ll contribute to the delinquency. Nope? Scratch that. He was a drooling idiot and drank two gallons of milk, there’s your spoiler.

So they pulled that chip off the shelves “in an abundance of caution.”

The controversy of the chip is that kids can very easily get their hands on them. That, and the fact that the super hot bois don’t only burn your month and your lips, but also give you intense stomach cramps and explosive diarrhea. They can also, in rare cases, cause dysrhythmia and heart damage.

I was hanging out at this guy’s house when I was eighteen, and another guy there ate super hot ramen noodles. He flipped out and punch drywall and then punched his way through a crappy door and we didn’t see him for a week. Just saying.

I’m going to stick with jalapeno peppers. I’m good.