The Strangest Thing Found in a Colonoscopy

The Strangest Thing Found in a Colonoscopy- by Liam Sweeny.

You know I love to bring you all that is bizarre in this world of ours, and, of course, the strange tends to hang out with the disgusting, so here we go. You know those stories about what doctors find ‘up there’ that must be removed with special instruments, balloons, guide-wires and so on. Light bulbs, bowling pins, you know. People just sit on all this stuff, they should be careful, am I right?

Well, a man in Missouri had no idea something was ‘up there’ as he went for a routine colonoscopy for colon screening. Just a normal day, preceded by three normal days on a liquid diet, and the doctors say “action!” and the camera goes up, up, up… and there it is. A fly. Completely intact.

I think we can all sense the mystery here. By the time food enters the colon, it’s been through demolition derby a la stomach acids. I fly swallowed would be a black blob. Not an intact fly. So it didn’t come from above. Cue the music… “It Came From Below.”

How? How-how-how!? How in the hell do you ‘sit on’ a fly? Follow me here. In order to get up in his colon, it had to be alive at some point. It had to swim-rather-buzz against the current. How did he not know there was a fly up there?

So the doctors had no idea. I mean none. I kind of wish they had an explanation here.  Allthough if I end up with a fly up my bum, what the hell am I going to do about it, sneeze? Maybe I don’t want to find out this is common and 4 out of 5 doctors have seen it in the ER.

Can’t wait until it’s my turn to get screening colonoscopies.

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