The Cookie – The Weird Side of the Internet

Written by on June 24, 2024

The Cookie – The Weird Side of the Internet – by Liam Sweeny.

So this one is a doozy, folks. Now what we say about ‘no politics’ also applies to religion. We’re neutral. No ideological statements or positions here, folks. Just bizarre facts.

Here’s the first fact. In Catholicism, the holy communion is a wafer of uleavened bread (I believe that’s what it is) that becomes the body of Christ through what’s known as transubstantiation. You may consider this symbolic, but die-hard Catholics believe it literally. What no Catholic believes, save one, that it’s a cookie. And no one, save one more, believes that it should be defended dentally.

So here’s our one and two. Father Fidel Rodriguez, St. Thomas Aquinas Church, St. Cloud, Florida. A devout priest, who, upon giving out communion, encountered a parishioner (maybe a parishioner) whom he felt wasn’t able to receive communion. The reason isn’t all that clear, but he declined to give it to her. This caused her to demand that he “give her the cookie.”

So maybe we’re seeing why he refused her communion. Like a lot of kids growing up in my neighborhood, I was an altar boy. You *never* call the communion, the holy host, a cookie. It is both an insult to the body Christ and to cookies, because it doesn’t taste like anything. It’s not a slice of pumpernickel, or a macaroon, it’s just a wafer.

So not only does she ask for a cookie, then demanded a cookie, she came back later and tried to grab all the cookies. And father Fidel Rodriguez bit her.

Some people, probably at the behest of the cookie thief, wanted him arrested for assault, but the archdiocese of Orlando claimed that he was protecting, well, God basically, and he only had one free hand.

While there is no explicit prohibition against cannibalism in the Bible I don’t think, it’s very well accepted that biting people is a sin. Also, why didn’t he just punch her in her cookie chute?




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