Karens – The Weird Side of the Internet

Karens – The Weird Side of the Internet – by Liam Sweeny.

Karens. You know them; you love to hate them. Not people named Karen. You know what I’m talking about. Karens. The very bane of retail and customer service. Karens have rights and privileges in American society, and they’re willing to fight for them, counter by counter, manager by manager.

I’m kind of the opposite of a Karen. I feel bad for them when they screw up my change. My willingness to put up a fuss in a store is kinda thin. I’m like ‘keep the change’ usually unless we’re talking about the change that folds.

Back to “Karens.” Gen Z is looking for another name for Karens. Maybe a male equivalent. The talk was that “Ken” should be the male Karen, but when Ryan Gosling brought Ken to life in Barbie, the name has come off the list.

So how do you name the male Karen? One novel way was thought up by Trustpilot, and that was to go through all the ratings, and find out what name was most given for one star reviews. And that name was David.

David. And that makes sense if you think about it. David, up against the Goliaths of commerce, large and small. But yeah, David. Karens and Davids.

I’m not really feeling this one. David’s a super common name. Everybody knows a few Davids, and it makes sense that more one-star reviews would comes from Davids. That’s like saying that Bill should be the new Karen. We need something else.

I’m thinking that we have hordes of Jaydens and Braidens and other ‘dens now. Maybe ‘Brayden?’ Karens and Braydens? I’m throwing in Brett and Oliver. I don’t know why, but what the hell? Sorry all Bretts and Olivers; take one for the team. You know what, I’ll add Liams to the list. Not that it applies to me, but I am a team player.

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