Labubu Demon Madness – The Weird Side of the Internet

Labubu Demon Madness – The Weird Side of the Internet – by Liam Sweeny.

What is a Labubu? Is it a Cabbage Patch Kid or a My Little Pony? Or is it a Funko-Pop? It’s maybe a little bit of all of those. It’s a doll that has cute mixed with monster. That’s, I guess, the draw of the latest craze. But there’s a wrinkle in this one. Labubus are getting lit afire.

See, there’s a conspiracy theory that says that Labubus are “possessed” bvy a demon named Pazuzu, coming all the way from Mesopotamia. This is also the name of the demon in The Exorcist. Now if you look at a mythical picture of Pazuzu, you won’t see much reason to think it was possessing cotton-poly blend stuffed toys. But I’m sure if it’s a conspiracy theory, a bunch of loose associations and correlations without any causation will show us why there are an army of supernational miscreants in our incoming packages.

I’ve always wondered about idols and all that, I’m an old-school Catholic, well, old school lapsed Catholic. I mean, were Cabbage Patch Kids idols? How do we describe the absolute bloodshed that comes on Black Friday when that latest thing goes on sale? Is this idolatry, or is it just a sort of acid reflux of a hyper-charged consumer society.

So here we have people burning dolls that are all the rage and maybe the only blessing to be had is being had as the people making these dolls and their replacements. And we can’t forget people who cover weird ass stuff, people like yours truly.

So where do we go from here? Do we buy Labubus or do we stay away? I imagine there’s probably people buying them hoping they’re possessed. Do Voodoo priestesses pass stuffed demons on to rude customers? Or perhaps to the really good customers?

I kind of want a Labubus.

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