Immortal Reps – The Weird Side of the Internet

Immortal Reps – The Weird Side of the Internet – by Liam Sweeny.

I had a gym membership once. If you know what I look like, you wouldn’t bother to go to that gym, but neither did I, which is why you’ll probably be okay there. Supposing you actually go. But this was an old school gym in an old school city. This was the kind of gym you go to after two-and-a-half in the joint. Rocky went there, had his own heavy bag. Okay, so that one was a fibber, but you get the point. One thing about this kind of gym is that you pay, you go, you stop going, you stop paying. Simple, don’t let the door hit you on the way out ‘cause it’s heavy as hell. No convoluted contracts, no fuss. And a bakery was right across the street.

But we all know the other kind of gym, the one that has you hitting the polished gym floor like you just bought into a timeshare. Your hair is now white and wild and wooly because you just encountered the kind of math they give prizes for. You know you’re locked in, but the key might as well be buried in the bottom of a 50 pound jar of whey powder.

But a Chinese man named Jin got the deal of a lifetime at a local gym. Three lifetimes. Three long lifetimes. I know I give you a lot of Chinese stories, but that’s because there are billions of people in China, so there’s a ton more weird stuff.

Jin was encouraged by his gym to purchase some long term memberships, with the guidance from the gym owner that he could sell them to others at a higher price and, after a small commission, he would pocket some serious Yuan. And they got this guy to buy a ton of these memberships. $18,000 worth of memberships. And if Jin had worked out with glasses, he could’ve read that the memberships were non-referrable, and he just bought himself 300 years of gym memberships. So yes, he was scammed. But I feel bad for him, because his ridicule hits us all a little bit close to home.

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