Sassy Says: When Did Being Nice Become a Chore? -BY: SASSY AUBURN

I am a pretty patient person. Okay, that’s a lie. I have patience but you could probably put it in a toothpaste cap and maybe have some room to spare. I’m not an impatient ass who sits five cars back at an intersection honking if the first car’s wheels aren’t moving a millisecond after the light turns green. But I will WTF+ them loudly in my vehicle after a bit to at least make myself feel better. I know my limits. I think.

After experiencing all the bullshit we have been through with Covid, I thought much of our “zero tolerance” demeanor had been affected by the stress and anxiety that lockdown had brought on. Sure, we were a conglomeration of emotions: scared, mad, confined, depressed, betrayed. The list goes on. Even with things calming down now, however, tensions are still high as a result of it all. Many people get mad quicker, yell louder, have become more impatient faster and at times get downright mean. With my focus primarily on the fashion and glamour industries, I can honestly say I’ve never seen so many graphic t-shirts that say “Just Be Nice” in my life during the past few seasons. Really? People need to wear clothes to remind others of that? Sad.

I have noticed the older I get, the more impatient I can get through. After experiencing another birthday last month, the realization that time is fleeting has hit me hard. To be honest, I stopped counting years at 33. I was told, “If it was good enough for Jesus, it’s good enough for me.” In reality, all of our time is limited. We want to do as much as possible in as little time as possible. Hell, if my feet hit the floor in the morning and get me to the bathroom? I’m way ahead of the game for the day. And I’m thankful. And I’m happy. Well, until someone pisses me off. Then all bets are off. For the most part. Kind of.

What drives me crazy more than someone bitching about the price of eggs to themselves in the supermarket is a person who bitches about the price of eggs to the cashier at the supermarket. Then the bagger. Dude…. really? Or the person screaming at the pharmacist because she took all her Valium too soon and can’t get a few to ‘tie her over’? Or the doctor’s receptionist who gets her ass handed to her because a person with stroke symptoms was taken in before their arm rash was seen? I have witnessed each of these examples personally. And to be honest? Each of them was ugly to watch. I was so upset about what the pharmacy customer had done and said that I followed her to her car then reamed her out royally. When I was done, I told her “Yeah. See you next Tuesday.” She looked scared yet confused. Dumbass.

When did being nice go out of style? Okay, the shutdown did not help any of our mental well being. In fact, for some it was – and continues to be – very difficult. But that really doesn’t give anybody the right to be an asshole. It takes much less time to smile, be polite, be funny, and say thank you than it does to yell, degrade, insult, and just be freaking rude. They are people too. You have no idea what they may be going through at home. You have no idea what is going on in their life. You have no idea what is going on in their head. You’re not the only one in that moment. To put it another way, it’s not all about you. Remember that.

If you feel the need or have the desire to get a jazzy tee (remember Pantone’s color of the year is Very Peri, #17-3938) to remind your fellow man to be nice, then go for it. Whatever helps. It is sad though to have to remind people to do things we learned in kindergarten. We are supposed to put things back where we found them, don’t hit people, and say you’re sorry when you hurt someone. And don’t pee in the sandbox. That’s a given.

But put yourself in this situation for a minute:

Would your bad day get a little better if a total stranger smiled at you? Gave you a compliment?

Or would you prefer a scowl, the middle finger and a mumbled “You dickweed.”?

Yeah, they would probably feel the same way if that happened to them. I know I would. 

Just be nice.