Post-Mortem Passenger – Fun at the In and Out

Written by on December 22, 2023

Post-Mortem Passenger – Fun at the In and Out – story by Liam Sweeny.

You’re not going to believe this. It is actually my hope that you aren’t going to believe most of the things I write about in these stories, but I can assure you they are real. And this one is real, but absolutely unbelievable.

Imagine you’re knocking back a few in Dallas, definitely shouldn’t drive but you do anyway. So you’re on the highway, and you hit a deer. Do you stop? Nah, just a deer, right? It flipped over the car, and you got places to be, in this case, a Jack-in-the-Box. And, undeterred, you get there, maybe you order, or maybe you pull over in the parking lot to rest your eyes.

Then picture the cop that tells you to get out of your car, and he tells you something else – that there’s a dead body in the passenger seat.

Murder mystery, right? Nope. Just what the guy thought was the deer, the thing he hit so hard that it flipped over the hood and somehow ended up in the passenger seat. Well, most of the guy ended up there. Some of him was left back where he got hit. I’m not sure what parts ended up where.

This is a terrible tragedy, but I just know how drunk you have to be not to noticed you picked up a dead human in shotgun? Did he think it was the deer? Was he going to bring it home, or to a buddy who could cut him up some venison steaks?

When talking about trashcans, it is said that there is an overlap between the smartest bears and the dumbest humans. This should apply to cars. A car should be just complicated enough to drive that some a**hole that drunk can actually figure it out.

So, moral of the story. If there’s a guy in your passenger seat that can’t change your radio station, make sure he’s not dead. Or a deer.


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